Family What An Amazing Thing

We have crossed another road trying to help my 16 year old J deal with her drug abuse. She was supposed to go to Iowa and be a nanny for my sister's 1 year old daughter. But, when it became clear that she was still using heavily and not just the occasional slip as she would like to have had me believe we knew she needed more help then we had been capable of giving. My sister spoke with her doctor from here and he said that he strongly felt that the only choice for J was an inpatient program. My sister jumped right on it and had an appointment for the drug assessment and a bed lined up at a rehab center for youth 20 minutes from her house that day. Then for the next 2 weeks waiting for the appointments she took care of my daughter which was not an easy task. We will forever be indebted to her for being able to show J the "tough love" she so desperately needed.
After the drug assessment appointment took place and it became clear to J that she was headed for a treatment program that would last anywhere from 3 - 6 months she went through a wide range of emotions. She spent the next 5 days trying to convince anyone that would listen that she was ready to quit, had a plan, and wanted to be home by July 4th! It was a challenge to remain steadfast in our decision while listening to her plead, beg and try to manipulate her way home. Although, it was much easier to be firm with her over the phone and keeping in mind that I had to back my sister up 100% for this to work. The rest of the family has also stepped up with their words of encouragement and support in our decision.
Yesterday was the day S took J to the center and through the intake process and then had to leaving my daughter there. When she got out to the parking lot she called me and we sat on the phone and cried...it is a lot harder to leave your child at a rehab center then you would think. I think like S said you look around and don't want to believe that your child really belongs there. But no matter how well we had tried to raise our daughter she had made choices that were putting her life at risk. The program is 90 days but could go as long as 6 months depending on how she progresses through the 3 phases of treatment. Each phase is supposed to last 30 days but some take longer to get through one phase or another.
This will be the longest period of time we have ever been apart from our daughter and it is going to be hard but I pray in the end that this will all be worth it. While she is gone I am going to be going to counseling to learn how to be a better parent and what we need to do to prepare for J to come home. Hopefully we all will have learned from this experience and we will be able to guide B & B through their Junior High and High School years with a little more confidence and success. I have also realized once again what a wonderful family we have not everyone is lucky enough to have the love and support that we do.