Let's Take It From The Top~

I am a 42 year old mother of three great kids. But I also have a step-daughter, CJ 25, so she is a grown woman, so I am a Mom of four. My dream to grow up and have a family started from the time I was very little. Which was due in large part to the fact that I was the oldest of four girls and the best parents in the world. A very loving and ideal family. I graduated from high school ranked 3rd in my class with a 3.98 GPA and voted Miss Bobcat of my Senior Class. It was a big deal to be chosen Mr & Miss Bobcat your Senior Year at my High School.

I moved out on my own and went to college for about 1 1/2 years of college then decided that I would just work for awhile it was shortly after that I met the man of my dreams Dino (his wife had left with his 3 year old daughter, CJ, a few weeks before) just before I turned 21 years old and we started dating about six months later. Then when I was 24 we were married, then a short 1 year 13 days had our first child, JG, a girl. Four years later we had our son, BD, much to our surprise 17 months later came our youngest, BA, a girl. Bearing children had taken a toll on my body & self-esteem too. I seemed to have gained over 100 extra pounds that apparently became very attached to me because I still can't get rid of them. (Oh and did I mention that my youngest is 10 1/2 now!)

When BA, turned 3 I went back to college to finish my degree in Business Administration emphasising in Accounting and Marketing. In 2004 upon graduation I set out applying for every job available in our area.....I was hired by a locally owned ISP/CLEC 2 months later and I am still currently employed there but have moved up in the ranks from a customer service representative to the Office Manager. Now here it is 5 years later I have learned many of the dfferent aspects of both the telephone and the internet/computer industry.

In our family life JG is now a sophomore, BD is finishing the 5th grade and BA the 4th we have had many growing pains as a family in this day and age. Making it through getting JG's beginning of her teen years was a painful growing experience for all concerned. Middle school and now that we are almost through her Sophomore year of High School I feel like we have almost come full circle me a better parent and her more self aware then ever. Just in time for BD to start the Middle School next year OH GOODY!!!!

As the pressures of having a career, raising kids, marriage and keeping a household together (the cooking, cleaning, laundry, errands, shopping, running kids around on their busy schedules....) well life in general. Is starting to resemble that favorite well worn sweater that you love so much... Lets face it the edges are getting ragged, maybe a few holes and those holes will eventually start to unravel much to your dismay!! Something is just not right! I think the "hole" shall we say that seemed to start unraveling over the last few months is my health so I decided that it is time for me to say, "Enough is Enough!"

I am too young to start have my health failing me and my kids are definitly to young to not have an active healthy Mom in their lives as well. That is when I decided to start this blog it is somewhere for me to sort out my thoughts by writing them down. Then maybe I can work through the issues in my life helping so I can gain some much needed perspective as well...

The other tool I hope to aide in my self discovery is my decision to call Dr Joel the old family favorite. I think if anyone could help guide me down this much needed trail of self discovery so that I can learn to appreciate and love life again it would be him! I called his office to make an appointment but he isn't taking new patients so I asked for his VM and pulled the, " I am N. E.'s oldest daughter and I know you arent taking new patients but I was really hoping that you would give me a call and agree to see me at least one time because I don't know what else to do. But I do know that I am ready to be ME again!!!!!